Napping – A Guide For People

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For some reason Peoples do all their sleeping at once, I think so they can do more work, which is their favourite thing. Cats know this is foolish. Because they’re not supposed to and it makes them mess up all the work they’re trying to do.

Peoples should sleep at least twice a day, of course cats can do more, but we’re experts. People’s are just beginners so they can only do two sleeps. After studying Dasha, who does try to be an excellent People, but fails most of the time, I discovered that Peoples have four different types of sleep. which isn’t anywhere near the amount that we cats have, but if it’s all you can manage, then it’ll just have to do.

Firstly, there’s the big, long, night sleep you all do. This is the main time when your body does its heeling and your brain does its remembering. Most of you are very good at this but you don’t do it long enough. Most of you grown up Peoples need between 7 1/2 and 9 hours sleep. Sometimes Dasha is bad and she only has 6, but most of the time she sleeps proper.

By proper I mean, People Sleep goes through 5 different stages, which all sort out different things. The first stage is Non-REM 1 which is a light sleep where you Peoples gradually relax your muscles and consciousness, Non-REM 2 is when you Peoples go deeper into sleeping and lose consciousness of what’s around you, Non-REM 3 is also called slow-wave sleep and this is when your body fixes itself up. Then there’s REM sleep, which is when you dream and Awakening, this happens after REM sleep and is usually what’s happened when you wake up in the middle of the night for no reason. In a night you will go through these stages a few times. It is supposed to be better to wake up exactly at the right time in your sleep cycle, or you feel groggy and sleepy still, which is why alarm clocks can be bad if they wake you up in the wrong place.

Dasha is very funny, she wakes up exactly 10 minutes before her alarm is set and turns it off and then wakes up by herself. I wonder why she has an alarm at all, since she can get up without one. But either she doesn’t realise how good at sleeping she is, or she’s just very stupid. I asked her once, why she bothered and she said if she didn’t set the alarm, she wouldn’t have to wake up to turn it off before it woke her up. Which is quite a stupid state of affairs.

Anyway, when she hasn’t slept proper she has a nap and there’s three types of nap for Peoples:

The Catnap

It’s named after us cats because we invented it. It’s when you sleep for 10-20 minutes and it increases alertness, motor skills and concentration, not just in cats but in Peoples too.

The Forty-Winker

Is when you take a longer nap of about 45 minutes, because you’re extra tired. Dasha really likes this one because it’s long enough for her to dream a few dreams. This nap has all the good things of a catnap, but because it has dreams in it, it is the sort of sleep that enhances sensory processing and creative thinking.

The Mini-Sleep

This is one that Dasha does when she’s had too much grog the night before, and she wakes up all grumpy. If she has to do real People work she gets double grump. But it’s also a uselful type of sleep if you have to do lots of thinking and concentrating during the day, because it allows you to un-muddle your head and because you can go through a complete sleep cycle, you can wake up all freshy. If you really need it, this is the best type of nap because it does everything.

The Best Time For Napping

People are actually supposed to have two sleeps, one at night and one in the day, and when in the day depends a lot on what type of a People you are. There’s one’s who like to get up early, and ones who like to stay up later. The early ones need to nap earlier (at 1pm or 1.30pm) and the later ones need to nap later (at 2.30pm or 3.00pm)

Regular napping will make you smarter, healthier and better at doing all the works you do. So it’s a good idea to make time for a nap 2 or 3 times a week just to keep you all tip top. Now I wrote a lot and need a nap too.

For more advice on the health benefits of napping have a look at Napping: the expert’s guide

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