Dasha has written a lot about cats, in fact all you peoples have, you think you know everything. So I think its time that we cats told you a few things about yourselves. We cats do our best to look after you but a lot of advice goes unheeded. First – you work too much, work, work, work. Even on your days off you find excuses to work. You’re all so stressed and that’s bad because it makes you sick, and if you’re sick, then who will get the food? You need to look after yourselves better than you do and you need to chill out, now some of you (those of you who understand what we cats try to show you) are good at relaxing, and some of you, Dasha included, are horrific bad at it.
Despite my best efforts and my cutest and fluffiest attempts to get Dasha to stop doing stupid things, (like washing her car just before she goes out and gets it all dirty all over again an hour later) she still won’t slow down. So it’s time to teach her, and you, how to chill out like a cat. So you can feel better and happier and live for longer.
How to chill
First find a warm cosy spot, with lots of cushions and sit or lie in it. Then close your eyes and feel you breath as you breathe in an out. Once you’re completely focussed on your breathing, start to breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth. Breathe deeply feeling your belly and lungs and chest moving. If you have any thoughts, think them. Then breathe in, still through your nose as you count to five slowly, and then count to five again as you breathe out through you mouth. This should all take about 20 minutes, but you can do it as long as you like. When you feel like you want to get up and do something else, make sure you stretch properly. First your fingers and toes and arms and legs and back and neck and get up slowly. If you get up too fast you might get fluffy head and fall down so make sure you’re properly alert before you get going.